Political Humor

There is a federal election happening in Canada at the moment.  I will head out to vote after the weekend.  There are signs in yards all over our city advertising the different parties running.

My mother in law relayed the following conversation to me after bringing Emmett home from a visit with her yesterday:

Grandma to Emmett:  So, I see that your neighbours are voting NDP in this election.  Who will you vote for, Emmett?

Emmett:  I will vote for KFC.

The End.

Twirly.

I made Charlotte a new dress for Spring.  It is from the same pattern I used for her babydoll top and ruffled pants. (McCalls 6065, if you are curious)

I went in to this project feeling pretty confidant since the shirt went together so well.  I got a Karmic smackdown in no time.  I had to rip apart and sew the bodice on this dress twice and the second time I didn't leave much left in the seam allowance so I think I brought the top down a full size.  It fits Charlotte's narrow torso better than the first top did, but it brought me many problems when it came time to fit the skirt in.  For some strange reason, the skirt fits the outside of the bodice perfectly, but when it came time to sew the lining down, I had too much skirt.  I have absolutely no idea how I managed to pull that blunder off, but by the time I had realized it and spent the better part of an afternoon, machine sewing it, then ripping it out, then spending the evening hand-sewing it back in, I was done with this dress and starting to resent it.  What is a crafty person to do?  Why slap a big flower over the weird bunchy bit at the front and call it a day.

Aside from the challenges I had with the construction of the dress, I did make a couple of modifications on purpose:  I added four inches of length to the skirt so that it would be long enough to last through a growth spurt or two.  I also left the sides of the outer skirt open to make the dress extra twirly and to allow the pretty lining fabric to peek through a bit more.

The dress was put to the twirl test on our walk to school this morning and passed with flying colours.

I think I need to sew something for myself now.  My mom was very kind and got me a discount card for my local fabric store, and the gorgeous Laura Ashley patterns are calling out to me.

It was only a matter of time.

I got my first pair of glasses when I was in grade one.  Richard got his in grade six.  For the past two years our optometrist has been telling us Emmett's eyesight is getting worse each year.  A few weeks ago Emmett came home from school complaining of a headache and telling me he has been having a hard time seeing the spelling words on the bulletin board.  I was waiting for this day.

Didn't he pick out a stylish pair?  He has an equally stylish extra pair in my bedroom just in case he has an accident with these ones.

It has been so long since I got my first pair of glasses I am having a hard time remembering everything I need to tell him about owning them.  They are just a part of my body now.  So far I have come up with:  don't sleep in them, don't let your classmates try them on, and leave them with your teacher on Swimming Day at school.  I am sure more stuff will come up in the coming days.

Charlotte is jealous she can't have glasses so I ordered her a pair of frames with non-prescription lenses in them when I ordered a pair of prescription sunglasses for myself.  She has to be just like her big brother.

Public Service Announcement

Our hot water heater died yesterday.  It was the second time this has happened in a year.  We found a repairman and left a message.  Richard poked around online to get a feel for the cost of a new heater.  I boiled water to wash the dishes that didn't fit in the dishwasher (hooray for the High Temp Wash function!) and the kids got cold sponge baths for bedtime.
This morning, at 0700 on the dot, the repairman called and came over. The thermocoupler was burned out.  Again.(it is the thingy that supplies fresh air to the pilot light to keep it lit)  He cleaned it up, relit the pilot light and advised us to buy an air filter attachment for it.  On the way out the door he mentioned it was a massive lint build up under the hot water heater that caused the problem and advised that I vacuum underneath the heater to clean things up.
Is your hot water heater in your laundry room?  Have you vacuumed under it lately?  Have you ever thought to?

Word to the wise:  add it to your Spring Cleaning List. Get off the computer and go and do it!  Your shower will thank you.

Snowball Effect.

I shouldn't be joking about snow.  There is some in the forecast for this week!

It all started with a pair of pants that were too short.  Charlotte liked these pants and they fit well everywhere else, so I decided to sew a ruffle to the bottom of the legs to add some length.  I went to the fabric store and found the perfect fabric.  The print matched some embroidery on the pants and looked great with them.  The fabric was gorgeous.  I decided that it would be a shame to waste the pattern on a tidbit of trim at the bottom of some pants.

This led me to the pattern books.  I found a cute summery baby doll top that would do the trick.  (The fabric store loves customers like me!)

A quick little job turned into an afternoon, evening and morning and another afternoon of work.  I am pretty sure Charlotte's dolly is going to get a dress out of the leftover fabric. 


All of this work just to make some pants a bit longer.

It was SO worth it!

Putting my Big Girl Pants on.

Last week at Sparks we did a field trip.  We visited a local vet clinic and learned important things like how to behave around dogs you don't know and why you need to groom your cat regularly. (We passed around a mat of cat hair the size of William Shatner's toupee.  I went home having an allergy attack.)  At the end of the presentation the girls had the opportunity to meet the office pet.  This is where I had to be so, so, brave.

I have a very deep-seated and irrational fear of snakes.  This guy is a seven-foot boa constrictor.  He seemed pretty nice, as far as snakes go.  Just out of arm's reach is the closest I have ever gotten to a snake without completely losing it.  His head is out of focus because I only got close enough to snap a quick picture then I beat a hasty retreat as soon as he moved. 

I tried so very hard to be brave because I don't want my girls to think it is OK to be scared just because I am.  I wanted them to be brave and learn that in this, controlled situation, it is OK to be near this guy.

I think I made a tiny step forward in learning how to conquer my own fear. 

I love how the girls are holding hands to help each other out.  It is so very sweet.

Dear Mother Nature....

This was the view from my front door this morning. Really.

....You missed April Fool's Day by a couple of days.  Why the heavy snowfall warnings now?  If this is some sort of a joke, it is not funny at all.   Seriously.  It's the last day of Spring Break and this is what you do??  So. Not.  Funny.

Maybe I shouldn't have complained so loudly about how ugly the slush is and how much work will need to be done to clean up Lucy's mess in the yard once the snow melts.  Maybe I shouldn't have thought about going for a run this morning after taking so much time off to be sick.

If you need me, I will be under my blankie on the couch knitting a sock and sipping tea today.

Ain't Misbehavin' Review and Giveaway

Disclosure - I am participating in the Ain’t Misbehavin’ program by Mom Central on behalf of Wiley Publishing.  I received a copy of the book to review and gift card as a thank you for my participation.  The opinions on this blog are my own.

When the opportunity came up for me to receive a book about discipline to review  I jumped at the chance.  I love getting new books to check out.  When I got this description in an email, I got even more excited.

... Ain’t Misbehavin’, is a book for theory-weary parents, who don’t have time to read an entire book, but need to flip to the page that tells them how to handle a specific behaviour.

Parenting expert Alyson Schafer has heard it all from the parents she’s worked with – tantrums, whining, sulking, cheating, lying, crying – and in her newest book, she shows parents how to stop flipping between being too firm and too permissive, but rather striking the right balance of respective yet effective with their discipline.

The book covers more than 100 common and normal kid behaviours that parents experience trouble with – the behaviours that Schafer is asked about most frequently by the parents who phone into her weekly call-in advice show, now in it’s 6^th season.


That is me in a nutshell.  I have a few parenting books on my shelfthat I have bought with good intentions, but never finished.  have paid overdue fees for many more)   I often don't have time to study and assimilate and embrace a whole new parenting philosophy when I just need a band aid.  This book is full of helpful band aids in the form of a clear, concise table of contents and charts sprinkled throughout the book.

One Day at a Time

It has been almost three weeks since I deactivated my Facebook account.  I have two weeks left. My thoughts still come out in the form of status lines sometimes.  I still wonder what the chatter is over there.  I have almost fallen twice, during very stressful times of day.  My friends Laura and Ami talked me down via IM each time.  (Thanks, guys!)

I miss certain things about Facebook--being able to let people know about playgroup, quickly scheduling playdates and catching up.  I am realizing who I really miss and who will probably be cut from my list when I get back.

Not having Facebook has made me much more productive around the house--I have time to clean and bake and be present with the kids.  I read more now.  Panic sets in when something happens and I need a break. (Like right now, when I just discovered Matthew found my brand new lipstick in my room and destroyed it.  I need to deal with it instead of running to the computer to hide--which I am doing right now, with my blog.)

This is so hard to do.

Why are they called Sleepovers?

This past weekend my little Sparks group teamed up with our sister Brownie group and had a slumber party.  I filled my van with craft supplies, bedding and jammies for two, and headed over to our local Giant Indoor Playground where I met my fellow leaders.

Out of my share of the girls, I had no fewer than three mommies cry at and one daddy look positively giddy beside his teary wife at drop off.  None of the girls cried.  Because of the facility, they got right down to the business of playing right away.  It was actually good PR for us.  I had my girls come in their uniforms and the facility was open to the public for the first little while we were there so people could see Girl Guides have lots of fun.

We got started on an extra messy painting craft after the wiggles were run out.  Then, after finding places to sleep, we all got into jammies and sang campfire songs with some snacks.  The girls were then tucked in with bedtime stories.  The grownups listened to whispers and giggles well into the night.  At the crack of dawn we were up and running again, playing, finishing our craft, painting faces, and then sending the girls back home to their parents.

Time flies at these things.  When it was all over I felt like I did when I used to have to work night shifts (both at the hospital and with newborns)  I was spent.  Richard tried to help out as best he could and took the two older kids to a movie when I got home and then cooked supper later.  I was in bed, asleep by 9:00 PM last night!  I am still droopy this morning.

This was my first sleepover with my girls and I am glad it was so successful.  We planned for weeks and it feels funny that it all went by so quickly. 

I am wondering how long it will take for me to make up my missing sleep???  Stuff like this makes me remember why I am  glad I don't have any more babies coming into my house.  I used to function on hours of sleep I could count on one hand for months at a time!  How did I do that???

The girls want to know when we are doing this again.

Friend Making Monday

Jodi over at And in My Corner...does this meme every Monday. I thought I might try it out today.  If you are coming here from another FMM site, welcome!  I hope you like what you see!

1. Who is your pick for the Final Four? 

Ummm... well I am in Canada and we don't do college football here like the US... so I will have ato pass on this one! (I just stole this answer from Jodi.  The only March Madness I participate in is at Go Fug Yourself)

2. What is your favorite workout/fitness activity? 

I have two favourites:  I love to run outside, but on days when the weather is not co-operating or I don't have anyone to watch the kids I cross train with one of my Biggest Loser or Jillian Michaels DVDs.  I do have a treadmill that I use for most of the winter, but I can't stay on it any longer than 45 minutes.  I go batty with boredom and really, if I am on it then the kids must be home and I can only get away with being unavailable for so long before bad things start happening!

3. Do you have a favorite healthy snack? Something that REALLY hits the

spot? 

I love sliced apple with a side of light spreadable cream cheese that has been sprinkled with a bit of brown sugar and cinnamon.  If I don't have cream cheese on hand, a scoop of cottage cheese with a packet of Splenda and a dash of cinnamon (and maybe some unsweetened applesauce) kills my sweets craving with a nice hit of protein.

4. What is your dream car? 

Funny how this question pops up on the week we have started shopping for a new(er) car!

Since we are talking about dreams, muscle cars like a Mid/late 1960s Pontiac GTO or a 1970's-era Plymouth Roadrunner really excite me.  The deep visceral growl of the engine, the aggressive lines.....so masculine and powerful...rawr.  Of course, I can't exactly drive around town with kids and groceries in one of those so we are on the hunt for a nice, dependable minivan with four doors that can seat seven.  I covet the Toyota Sienna, but will end up with a used Montana or Grand Caravan.

5. Have you set any goals for yourself this month? What are they? 

My goal this month is to finish of my Lenten Facebook Fast and re-integrate it into my life without losing myself again,  drink 2 litres of water a day and stop snacking after seven PM.  Boring, but necessary goals.  I also plan on getting back on the running wagon once I kick yet another chest cold that is making my asthma act up.

If you answer these questions on your own blog, leave me a comment with a link so I can stop by and read your answers.  If you want to answer and don't have a blog, just do it in the comments.

Just Dance

We had two extra days off from school this week.  Some moms look forward to the downtime.  Some moms dread it.  It is very treacherous outside so it is hard to go out and play right now (the world around here goes between a giant, jagged sheet of ice and dirty slush right now.  Today outside my window more snow is falling to cover up the ice.  Sweet.)  Day One I scheduled a giant, day-long play date for myself and the kids to keep us occupied.  Day Two, my plans fell through and the kids spent most of the day trashing the house and fighting with each other.

Then this happened:

Do spontaneous dance breaks happen at your house too?

A Short Film by Emmett: Milk Cat vs Milk

Emmett loves drawing comics.  Whenever he has a spare moment he is creating comic books with very interesting characters and surprisingly complex illustrations.  This is the first comic book he has chosen to turn into a film.

(here is a Youtube link if your computer isn't compatible with the Blogger media player)

Poop.

Last night's Sparks meeting was part 2 in my 2 part series to get the Healthy Spark badge.  I brought my stethoscope to the meeting so the girls could listen to each other's hearts, lungs and tummies.  The girls had a lot of fun listening to the gurgles in their stomachs and made a game out of guessing what everyone had for supper.  I taught the girls to take their pulses and then we tried an experiment where we took our resting heart rates, and then jumped around and took our pulses again.  My partner set up a table of bandages and everyone practiced their dressing skills on teddies and dolls they had brought for the occasion.  We ended the meeting by handing out paper dolls that showed what the insides of their bodies looked like.  There was much giggling and pointing at the end of the large intestine on the colouring sheet.  The girls thought the paper dolls were boys.  I very matter of factly said  "No.  That is the end of the large intestine.  That is where the poop comes out."  Of course that made the girls laugh even harder!  So, after my partner and I carefully constructed a meeting full of information and fun, what are the girls going to remember the most?

That is where the poop comes out.

Ahh, the mind of a five year old!

Shrove Tuesday.

I have ranted about the evils of Facebook on more than one occasion.

I am a hypocrite.  I am on that page more often than I care to admit every single day.  It is a huge time vampire for me.  I can disappear down the Facebook rabbit hole for hours while my kids wreck my house and the laundry piles ever higher.  Books are stacked up on the table (and now piling up in my e-reader).  Projects ignored.  All because I have the need to look at some stranger's vacation pictures.

Today, I changed my status to read

Is thinking of giving up Facebook for Lent

 I got several responses ranging from " Nooooooooooooooo who'll I talk to???"  to  "That's such a good idea that I wish I was still a Catholic."  (Those were cut and pasted from my actual profile page)

I am an addict.  Facebook is the first thing I turn on in the morning and the last thing I look at before I go to bed.  It is getting out of hand.  Today is Shrove Tuesday.  The day before Lent.  I remember my friend April turned off her internet for the 40 days of Lent last year.  I am not going that far, though I applaud her dedication.  I live with a computer software developer.  Computers and the internet are a way of life for us.  I have just identified the biggest problem in my life and I need to gain some distance and perspective so I can re-integrate it in a more healthy way.  I am not even close to being a devout Anglican, but Lent is a nice, clear cut time frame in which to do this detox process.  Lent is also a time traditionally reserved for reflection and introspection.  I feel like distancing myself from Facebook for a while will make me a better person in the long run.

There are people from far away places I will miss having easy contact to.  I know that.  I am sure the first few days will be the hardest.  But, I am not cutting off all modes of communication.  You can find me here.  You can find me on email.  IM.  I have a phone and a cel phone.  It is just that even with all of those other distractions, Facebook is the hardest one to turn off.    The fact that I am still online, even though I am not on Facebook will be tough.  In fact, let me put this out right now.  If you catch me on Facebook during the next 40 days I will donate 10 dollars to the Canadian World Friendship Fund. 

Hey, the upside could be more blog posts for you to read!

I can do this, can't I??

Another milestone has been reached.

It finally happened.  Charlotte and her harem of Barbies have lived in relative peace for the past three years.  Then Matthew came along.  We have a casualty.




I am giving the patient a good prognosis for long-term recovery.   Despite the complete fracture of Rapunzel's cervical spine and the loss of the vertebrae I think she will be fine with restricted activity.  If the injury reoccurs, Dr. Dad may have to do a spinal fusion with advanced polymer technology.

I am slowly going crazy....

What is it about February??  Charlotte and I were doing really well.  She was sleeping better and her moods were stabilizing nicely.  We had a lovely couple of weeks of equilibrium.  Then, February came.  The excitement of an upcoming birthday and the Arts Festival and a bit of a cold threw her into a tizzy.  Tantrums, sleep disturbances, mood swings.  I am feeling the effects of late winter angst as well.  I don't like how I feel in my own skin lately.  Old habits are creeping back in and I am mad at myself for slipping with my workouts and diet.  I am having a hard time running and it used to feel so good.  I am sick of having the same arguments with Charlotte over the same things.  I am tired of cooking the same food every day, washing the same clothes and cleaning up the same messes.  I know I am not the only one to have this feeling at this time of year.

As I type this the kids are downstairs trashing the playroom and screaming and my blood pressure is rising and I am feeling tension in my chest.  If I look to my left I will see a desk littered with paper and markers and books and toys.  One of those markers was recently used on the computer monitor.  I am so frustrated that there doesn't seem to be enough hiding places in the house for things the older kids need that the youngest can use for the purposes of evil.   I want to run away and hide but the windchill is minus 30 so if I go for a run outside I will surely have an asthma attack  

So, I hide.  I play with photos.  I scream at the kids.  I wait for Winter to end and hope the floodwaters don't rise too high. 

35

original shot, not too bad

very subtle effects added to gently boost colours and draw focus in to my face

Crazy fun with filters, eye, hair and lip enhancement (yes, I made my eyes blue.  Because I could)

Today is my birthday.  To celebrate I am sitting in my PJs playing with my premium subscription to the photo-editing site Picnik.  Yes, yes, all of you Photoshop wizards can scoff, but this is a really fun site.  Everything is really easy to use, so I can just relax and play without having to take a class first.

Tonight a babysitter is coming so I can stuff my face with sushi with some friends.  Tomorrow, I get to see Charlotte dance in the Arts Festival, and then chow down on a decadent chocolate cake made by the very talented Richard.

All in all, 35 is starting out to be a pretty good year.

Gider Jen

Yesterday was a cruddy day.  Kids and dog kept me up in the night, leaving me cranky and exhausted in the morning.  My new phone broke.  By some cruel twist of fate all of my Sparks helpers were unavailable at the same time.  I had to plan a meeting on the fly and come up with emergency back up helpers with almost no notice.  I was not sure how I could put my best face forward to the little girls who depend on me each week.

Then, two moms came to my rescue.  They sang the silly songs and enthusiastically played the silly games with their girls. I was given this:

Every time I look at it I can't help but smile.  My little Sparks were the perfect antidote to my stormy mood.

History Lessons, Part 2

 For those of you who might be new to my blog, click here to read History Lessons, Part 1.  Thanks for stopping by!

It is I Love to Read week in our school division.  This seems like a good time to talk about a book I recently read.

  How the Girl Guides Won the War is a fascinating story about the role European Girl Guides took during WWII. In the introduction, the author talks about how she was planning on writing a humor book, making fun of the Guides. During her research she realized she had to change the tone of her book as she learned more and more about how the Guiding movement helped the Women's Movement and girls who might not have had educational opportunities otherwise.


Can I just say that Girl Guides were seriously badass.  Brownies were taught to put out incendiary bombs with sand.  Guides ran foster homes out of abandoned manors in the countryside for evacuated city children.  There were Guide and Brownie groups run out of POW camps and in secret in Concentration Camps.   Merit Badges could be earned in rifle shooting and airplane mechanics.  Guiding gave these girls valuable survival skills that they taught to those around them.  Guiding gave them a routine to follow and a bit of normalcy to a crazy, scary time in their lives. The uniform was sometimes the only nice article of clothing these girls had.


I grew up in Guiding.  I started as a Brownie, worked my way through Guides and Pathfinders and then became a Jr. Leader in Brownies and then Assistant Leader in Guides.  I am now a Sparks Guider and starting Charlotte on her own Guiding journey..  I am proud to be part of an organization that was started by women and is still run by and for women.

I have learned some useful skills through Guiding and in reading this book, learned that some of the things I have learned for fun were actually used for survival at the beginning.  Fellow Guides out there:  do you remember having to cook sandwiches with Buddy Burners on a  coffee can camping stove?  I used them for fun and to earn a badge.  Guides in war-torn London taught people how to cook their daily meals on them.  Guides used to hold bomb shelter singalongs to help pass the time during air raids and to help calm people down by distracting them (it falls under one of the old Laws:  A Guide smiles and sings, even under difficulty.) I did that once too.  I once had to escort a rural patient by ambulance to a city hospital to have some tests done and get a terminal diagnosis confirmed.  The poor person was understandably worried and scared and stressed.  What did I do to help?  I sang silly campfire songs to him in the back of the ambulance to help take his mind off things for a moment.  The paramedics in the front thought I was nuts, but the patient managed to crack a smile and stayed relatively calm for our journey.

Even if you are not a Guide, I highly recommend this book.  It is a very interesting story about a very important time in world history.

I think it is essential reading for Guides, especially this month, when we celebrate the anniversary of the birthdays of our founders.