Tuesday, November 24, 2009

When did I get old???

I am 33. I thought I was young. Yes, I have been dyeing my hair for12 years because of premature greying, but let's emphasize the word premature here!

So, who says I'm old?? The September Issue of More Magazine.
More is a magazine marketed to women 40 years old and over. Why am I reading it? My mom regularly shares her magazines with me and this is one she passes on. Some of the articles are interesting, but the article entitled How Not to Act Old (with an exerpt of the book by the same name) really rubbed me the wrong way.

According to the article I am Old. Why? I leave voicemail instead of text messages. I wear a watch (there is a clock on your celphone, fogey!), I don't wax , (umm, ouch!) I am interested retro things and I can cook a mean roast.

As someone under 40 this article insults me. I can't imagine it being funny to someone over 40 either. I thought that part of growing up was growing into confidance and maturity. Doesn't that mean I can stop caring about what other people think about me? Doesn't that mean I can stop bending over backwards to try to fit in with all the cool kids?

More, you really dropped the ball on this one. I thought that I was supposed to look to women older than me to learn from them. What am I learning here? That nothing ever changes? That I am supposed to do everything I can to be someone I am not? I don't even think Seventeen magazine is sending that message to their young readers anymore. You are beginning to sound a bit like American Cosmo, undermining my confidance in order to try to make me conform to a predetermined standard. I thought you were supposed to be teaching me to age gracefully and confidantly--not just to lie about my age and cling to a youth that is really not worth clinging to.

So, I am going to start now, Screw you, More Magazine. I am going to put on my 50's style apron, cook a roast and when I call you to invite you to dinner I might just leave a message on your voicemail. Don't RSVP by text message, though. I probably won't get it.


Ami said...

You were coloring your hair at 11???
Wow, that IS early!

I have never read that magazine, and I avoid most others, although I occasionally laugh at the covers of the ones in the checkout line.

Can I come over for some roast beast?

ValleyGirl said...

HERE, HERE!!!! (Or is it "hear, hear"? I never really know!) In any case, I'm jumping up, raising my fist in defiance, and shouting "YES!" in agreement with you!!!!! Followed by a round of applause.

That writer is a dolt. Certainly completely missing the point of MATURITY and that it is a thing to be desired, not despised.

Kim said...

Count me in as another 33 year old offended. I don't cook roast on account of being pescatarian, but I do think there is all kinds of value in personal connections (in any form-- voicemail, in person conversation, text, email) and all kinds of value in maintaining and encouraging traditions (be they recipes, sewing techniques, knit stitches, whatever.) It seems to me this silly More article is advocating against this-- favouring empty appearance. Infuriating!
The only thing that is really telling in terms of age is our birthdate. Our actions, preferences, hobbies, and desires are personal and while some may be influenced by our age peers because of a society that urges us to associate only with those in very close age proximity to us, many are not.
Oh, I could just rant on and on!

Sandy said...

Jen, you are hilarious and I got a good belly laugh out of this post! I agree...screw them! If it's any consolation, I've never HEARD of them anyway. So there.