Wednesday, January 27, 2010


A lot of things have changed in my life in recent history. Least of which have been several friendships.

You could say I really noticed the trend just over a year ago with someone I met on a homebirth message board. She moved to my city, I showed her around our town, hung out with her and her kids and then had to distance myself as she got more and more brainwashed by a "church" (cult) here. It really hurt to do it, but I realized things were getting really bad when I started keeping a mental list of safe conversation topics in my head--I was tired of her trying to convert me so I tried to stay away from controversial topics as much as possible.

As things seem to happen now, in the age of social networking, our friendship met it's end on Facebook. I am sure it started with a video I posted on my profile depicting her Lord and Saviour in what I thought was a very amusing song and dance about Proposition 8, but to her was very offensive. With me, the final nail in the coffin was realizing I was only finding out about her life via status line updates and not at all from her. I started to feel less like a friend and more like a stalker so I quietly deleted her from my friend list and retreated to my corner to try to heal my wounded heart.

A few people have entered and left my life since then. I don't make friends easily and have never had a wide social circle so I am unsure how to deal with this revolving-door of people entering and exiting my life. Every exit is painful and often confusing to me. Am I really that hard to get along with? I wonder. As friendships evolve I am left with many questions that never seem to get answered. In some ways I wonder if I am making the relationships in my life more complicated than they need to be. I am not alone in my feelings. The January issue of Chatelaine magazine had a very interesting and comforting article in it. Here is the link to it, if you want to read it. I can wait.

I am having a harder and harder time dealing with how Facebook has changed how I interact with people. It is pretty easy to see how useful it is when you are talking about far-flung friends and relations, but what about the ones that live across town? I mean the ones that you can call without incurring long-distance phone rates. Why are we using it to talk instead of actually TALKING to people now??? I spend all day at home alone with kids. I crave the sound of an adult voice on the other end of the phone line sometimes. Being a stay at home mom can be a very lonely, isolating occupation and in some ways Facebook makes it better and in other ways Facebook makes it worse. I think that Facebook can make sticky situations even stickier.

It is crazy how I can be so mature and sure of myself in so many aspects of my life, but stuff like this throws me right back to Jr High, when I was so insecure and had no idea what made relationships tick. It has been many, many years since then. What am I missing here?

Monday, January 25, 2010

Interview with Emmett and Charlotte

I did this interview almost a year ago. Lets see how things have changed!

I typed out their answers, word for word as they told me. You could tell they were losing interest towards the end.

Maybe next year we can add Matthew's answers to this list.

Emmett, age 6, Charlotte, age 4

1. What is something mom always says to you?
Emmett--Be nice to everyone and don't poop and pee your pants.
Charlotte--Don't pee your pants.

2. What makes mom happy?
Emmett--When we be nice to you, Mommy.
Charlotte--If I don't pee my pants.

3. What makes mom sad?
Emmett--If you do be mean.
Charlotte--If you hurt yourself, Mom.

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
Emmett--Tell some jokes.
Charlotte--When you do a puppet show.

5. What was your mom like as a child?
Emmett--I don't know. Get Charlotte to answer it.
Charlotte--You played with babies and you took them to bed and put on their pyjamas.

6. How old is your mom?
Emmett--I don't know.

7. How tall is your mom?
Emmett--You are about 16
Charlotte--You are larger

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Emmett--Printing stuff for your friends.
Charlotte--Go shopping.

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
Emmett--Wait for us to come back.
Charlotte--Wait for me to come back.

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Emmett--You will be a guitar player.
Charlotte-Maybe you can be a cutting girl and cut trees off.

11. What is your mom really good at?
Emmett--I don't know.
Charlotte-You are really good at playing computers.

12. What is your mom not very good at?
Emmett--You are not very good at doing stuff.
Charlotte--You are not very good at cutting my hair.

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Emmett--I don't know.

14. What is your mom's favorite food?

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
Emmett--When you be nice.
Charlotte--What about painting pictures of us?

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Charlotte--A Rock Star

17. What do you and your mom do together?
Charlotte--we go shopping.

18. How are you and your mom the same?
Emmett--We have the same hair.
Charlotte--We are big together.

19. How are you and your mom different?
Emmett--I am smaller than you and you are bigger.
Charlotte--We are different than the neighbours.

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Emmett--I don't know.
Charlotte--When I hug you.

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Charlotte--Go home.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

This picture just makes me smile. Emmett is explaining the poster to Charlotte.
This is amazing for several reasons.

I am still in awe that Emmett's communication skills have progressed to the point where he can explain an anatomy poster to his little sister (well, his grasp of anatomy is as good as any six year olds....but you get my drift, right?)

And, I love catching these moments. Moments when there is peace an co-operation in my house. Moments where the kids are helping each other out with no coaching from me.

I registered Char for Kindergarten this week. She will be going to a French Immersion school in our city. She is so excited. So is her dad. He and his sister went to the same school once upon a time. Charlotte needs the extra challenge and stimulation a language-immersion program will give her.

I can't get over how fast everyone is growing up!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I'll finish this post once the room stops spinning.

Hubs and I went to Avatar last night. The pictures were very, very pretty. The story was a retread of a story that has been told over and over. The story was so familiar to me that I actually had Colours of the Wind stuck in my head for the rest of the night and for most of today.

Three hours with 3D glasses on did a number to my equilibrium. I walked out of the theatre very dizzy and with a pounding headache. I am still dizzy and nauseous today. I don't remember feeling so bad after watching Up in 3D, but that movie was only long enough to give me a bad headache. (It was totally worth getting a headache for, unlike Avatar)

So, can I get back to you once the room stops spinning?

Sunday, January 3, 2010

2010 in bullet points

Happy New Year!

My first post of the new year is going to be a random collection of bullet points that have been rattling around in my head since the last time I wrote.
  • New Years is usually a pretty quiet affair around here. To me, the real New Year happens in September, when there is actual, tangible change in the air. The seasons change, summer holidays transition into the routine of school and lessons....stuff happens. When January 1 rolls around, it is still cold, it is still winter, and the only thing I really have to do is remember to write a new year on the cheques I write.
  • I stopped making resolutions a long time ago. I figured that if I wanted to affect change in my life, why wait for one arbitrary day of the year? So, when we got a shiny new Wii for Christmas, I didn't wait for Jan 1 to start using it to exercise, I started on Dec 27, after heading out to buy a game that now whips my bum into shape five days of the week.
  • This year we did something different to ring in the New Year. I had an actual dinner party in my house with over 10 guests. My inlaws stopped by on their way to a skiing holiday and filled my house with food and fun. I have not been in close vicinity to teenagers since summer camp (where cel phones are banned) so, I had no idea that they must send text messages all the time. Is this really true, or does this just happen with the particular teenagers that were in my house?
  • I also found out that if you have hockey fans over on the night of a Big Game and you don't have cable or any sort of TV channels to speak of, they find other ways to get the score--like asking a nearby teenager to tap into the host's wireless network with his laptop to get streaming scores. (The teenager then shows the host's husband the Finnish version of the show Jackass and then the host is forced to watch it for the next week....sigh)
  • I loved having Richard home for a week. This is the first time he has had actual time off over any holiday season--you just don't get time off when you run your own business. Having him home was great! I got to be decadent and self-indulgent and plowed through a 1000+ page novel in four days!! It was divine and a great way to recharge my batteries between family celebrations. Of course, after conquering such a weighty tome, I have no idea what to read next. Decisions, decisions......
  • Emmett lost another tooth and grew half an inch over holidays. He now speaks with a lisp and has three new pairs of pants in his drawer since his other ones were looking like capris. (This kid also grew an entire shoe size between September and November....will I ever keep up to this???)
  • Matthew's vocabulary is growing, if you listen carefully and pay attention to context.
  • I found out I am a gonzo Star Wars Lego builder. I "helped" (ahem, toiled away while the boy watched) Emmett build two new projects, and we have two more left to do.
  • The Lego designers are geniuses. That is all I have to say about that.
  • Do you say Twenty-Ten, or Two Thousand and Ten??